Tag Archives: pain

// shatter //

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There is tremendous power in surrendering to the difficult process of who you are becoming. Honor yourself for being imperfect, jagged, conflicted. There is greater wisdom in your deepest burning question than in a thousand hollow, easy answers.

Worship at the tired, bloody feet of your own awakening. Be humble, be grateful for the crushing beauty that has buried her secret treasure in your struggle.

Not one of us here is spared the pain of humanity. Respect it, stand with it, fall on your knees for it, let it break you and teach you and spill its naked truth before you. Open into your dark places like flower petals thirsty only for the healing pricks of rain. There is power in darkness, without it there can be no transformation.

Remember that you are majesty, you are magic, you are not yet done. We are a continuum, a birthing and re-birthing of universes within universes.

Life, death, sex, union, explosion, creation, destruction, connection, heart break, tear drops.

We are but shattered shards of The Infinite Light collecting ourselves in the dark.

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// break //

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Some days punish and stimulate like cascades of warm rain sliding in hot crystal streams over bare summer skin. Like a lover’s willing mouth open, plush and ready, locked in a room you can’t find, in a building with walls that mirror each other.

Some days you are the artist and her muse, in a strange and masterful chaos you become the one you seek to observe: an illicit object, a distorted galaxy, a rotating world of tempt and threat, undressing.

I have felt Love on me like hands so crushingly gentle they shatter and collect me with every handsome, brutal intrusion; so commanding that even as I am falling apart, I am falling back together.

I have seen myself as beautiful even as I am drowning in self-abuse and self-sabotage. Something bigger than suffering exists. It watches without exhaust, it waits for millennia without tire or question.

Something so infinitely vast that it can cradle any amount of suffering and love all of it, as if nothing exists that is not Its own.

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// bare //

sorrow

Lay bare your softness.
Close your eyes and let your vulnerabilities fall in the darkness like heavy punishing rain.
I will take your tears into me like oceans of perfect stillness on the moon.
Let the sorrow splinter inside your mind, erupt over every inch of you, make you hot with surrender.
Let it in everywhere, let the gaping mouth of this terrible void devour you, drench you in the wisdom of her infinite healing waters.
Let Love have you, angel.
Let it press your war torn body against the floorboards.
And as the brutal weight of your crippling illusion collapses in raging spirals of ancient galaxies falling from the vacant sky, let go, let go, let go, let go.
This is strength burned into your flesh like beautiful scars.
Let the pain spark along your bones until you are consumed in the fires of release.
Let Love become you, own you, bloom a thousand blood red rose gardens inside of you.
You can take this, you are a vessel for all of this, you are the gift.
There are no acts of Love that cannot set you free.

~ Allison Marie Conway ~

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My book of poetry, Vein, is now available on Amazon here.

Signed copies are available in my Etsy shop AllisonMariePoetry here.

All my deepest love and mad affection. x

Dark Side of the Wound: When the Hurt Makes It Beautiful

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My eyes are shoved shut so tight I can physically feel the skin pulling taught behind my ears.

The first pristine pricks of the threat of a shattering cry are stabbing at the backs of my thin pulsing eyelids.

Fuck.

Even against the massive concrete resistance I’ve barricaded up, or maybe because of it, scorching tears pierce through and streak inky, crooked, blackened tracks across my cheeks.

Every drop of pent-up anger, shame, loss, greed, regret, jealousy and confusion plunges out of me onto the hardwood floor beneath my naked knees.

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5 Minute Spirit Detox: Letting Go of Attachment and Attack

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Letting go of attachment and attack is an important way to be able to stay in touch with our intuition and creativity. It is the best way to refresh and renew our spirits by allowing inspiration to come through us, unblocked.

This 5 Minute Spirit Detox Cleanse is a quick way to come back to center at the beginning and end of your day.

In today’s busy world, it is super easy to pick up, harbor and hold on to negative energy without even being fully aware of it. As we move about our jam-packed days we subconsciously absorb subtle (or, in some cases, not so subtle) messages of attack, pain, cruelty, self judgement, jealousy and stress.

If we don’t empty ourselves of all this heaviness, it compounds and sort of cakes up (not the good kind of cake with butter cream frosting and candles – we are talking about the bad kind of cake) inside of us without release.

In order to tune in to that higher frequency of love and peace, we need to acknowledge and release the negative energy we are holding on to that keeps us crippled and held back from our full potential. Negative energy is toxic for mind, body and spirit. It’s gotta go.

I hope this Spirit Detox cleanse will serve you well, dear ones.

(This and additional meditations are also available on iTunes, if you follow Glory Begin there for updates on the go.)

The 5 Minute Detox Meditation: Spirit Cleanse

(Transcript below)

Welcome, welcome angel to your five minute Spirit Detox meditation. This meditation is perfect for those who are willing, open and ready to go deeper with their spiritual practice and to surrender to the power of practicing non-attachment.

So let’s take a moment to sit up comfortably in your space, relax your mind and body.

Gently close your eyes and take a deep breath in deep, deep, deep, and exhale fully, all the way out your mouth.

As the following mantras are read, follow along and allow your spirit to be refreshed through the exercise of letting go.

I am empty of self doubt.

I am empty of stress.

I hold on to nothing.

I am empty of judgement.

I am empty of self attack.

I hold no attack toward others.

I empty myself of all harshness.

I hold on to nothing. I am empty.

I am a vessel for peace and light.

I let go of the heaviness.

I am empty of all hurt.

I am empty of all jealousy.

Empty of all cruelty.

I am empty of thought.

In this moment I need no thinking. No words.

I am empty of desire.

I am empty of the desire to please or to fix.

I am empty of the need for praise.

Empty of the need for validation.

I am empty in this moment and I am whole.

I have no attachment to the judgement of others.

I am empty of need.

I seek nothing.

I choose in this moment to empty myself of the fears.

I surrender my fear to Love for healing.

I am empty of holding on, I let go of controlling.

I am empty of the past.

Empty of the future.

I am empty now.

Take a deep breath in through your nose, exhale fully out your mouth.

Empty of all negative energy.

Allow all stress to leave your body.

Allow all tension to leave your mind.

As you breathe in again deeply imagine your breath filling you with light and love and peace.

Imagine your entire being filled with the warm life giving energy of the gentle power of love.

You are exactly where you need to be.

And to close this meditation take a moment to imagine your entire body and mind glowing with light and warmth.

Breathe in peace.

And when you are ready, open your eyes.

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Hi, angel. New here? Sign up to follow via email at the top of the page there. Also, listen to my free podcasts and connect more deeply with your creative self and spiritual being.

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© 2014 Allison Marie Conway at Glory Begin